My biggest struggle with this challenge has been finding time to write. I've had to get creative about where I write: bed, the kitchen, in the minivan, Starbucks, and more than once in the waiting room at a therapy center. Sometimes I can only write a paragraph but, late at night, after the kids are in bed, I can sit for hours. So I do. Some nights I even get to bed before 1 a.m. But, this year had been a year of me stretching my wings and this challenge is just one of them. I'm happy to say that I am just over half way to my goal. At this very moment, I've written 26,215 words.
This is the reason my little blog has gone forgotten for a few weeks. It might be a two or three weeks before I can get back to blogging. But I'll be back, I swear.
What am I writing? Well, this is a novel writing challenge so . . . drum-roll . . . I'm writing my first novel. I thought in lieu of a blog post, I share a short passage I've written. Now, remember, this is a rough (and, I mean, really rough) draft.
****
“Charlotte Anne, let’s
go. Move it!” I shouted down the hallway.
“Just a minute,” she said, her voice muffled and faint. Thirty
excruciatingly long seconds later, the toilet flushed and Charley ran down the
hallway towards me, her face flushed.
“Sorry, Tess. I had business to
take care of,” she said, her voice serious.
I just resisted rolling my eyes. “Next time, take care of your business before
we’re late, okay?”
“I’ll try but Daddy always says you can’t help when it’s
time to take care of business.” That sounded exactly like something Aaron would
say.
“Just get in the car!” I said loudly and herded us out
the door.
It was only after finally getting Charley strapped in the
car and I was pulling out that I felt it, the uneven gait of the car. I slammed on the brakes and hopped out,
leaving my door open, and rounded the car with a sinking feeling in my stomach. It was the rear passenger tire and it was
flat. A flat tire? Now? Really?
“Dammit,” I yelled, throwing up my hands. “Dammit. Dammit. Dammit.”
“Tess, those aren’t nice words,” Charley admonished me.
“Mommy says we have to use kind words, even when we’re angry.”
“I’m sorry!” My voice still too loud. I looked down at
that flat tire and something inside me broke a little. “I’m very sorry. I’m so sorry that you’re
late to your first day of school and that Dustin hates me for making him sit in
a car seat. I’m sorry we got up late and
you had to eat half a pop tart for breakfast.
I’m sorry!” My voice grew shriller with each word and my face felt like
it was on fire.
“I’m
sorry that I’m not good at this. I’m
sorry that your mom and dad are gone and you’re stuck with me. I’m sorry I don’t know how to talk to Dustin
and I am completely confused about how to help him and his autism. I’m sorry
that I wasn’t a better friend to your mom. I’m sorry that I screw up all the
time and I’m tired and the house is a mess and I don’t have all the right
answers. I’m sorry about . . . about . .
. about this dumb flat tire.” I kicked the tire in question and then winced as
pain shot through my leg. Worse though,
were the tears that started to fall, making my eyesight blurry. I tasted the salty wetness on my lips, felt
them fall to my shirt. “I’m sorry,” I
sobbed. “Dammit.”
My
legs gave out from under me and I slid to the ground, my arms windmilling out
to catch my fall. Tiny bits of gravel
bit into my hands as I sat there, crying.
I don’t know how long I stayed that way, staring at that tire, and
wishing I could take back all those words, when I felt a small hand on my
shoulder. Charley stood next to me, her pale blue St. Clair eyes somber. “I’m sorry, too, Tess.”
My
breath caught on a sob. “Oh, Charley.”
I’m not sure which of us reached for the other first but, the next moment, Charley
fell into my lap and wrapped her arms around me. I hugged her tight, burying my face in her
hair.
It
was then, from the back of the car, I heard a small, high-pitched voice yell,
“Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!"
I'd love to hear what you think!
Now, I'm going to back and write some more. Stop distracting me!
_____________________________
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